Res Ipsa Loquitur--What Kind of Preppy Are You?

So--someone recently called me a preppy dresser--and I didn't take much offense to it because I consider preppy dressing to be smart, snappy, classic, and stylish.  But recently, I started wondering what types of clothes are considered "preppy" by the general masses?  Is it Gap?  Banana Republic?  JCrew?  Ralph Lauren?  Tahari?  If that's the case, by all means, I'm wholly on board.  BUT--if "preppy" means the style of clothing traipsing about in places like Annapolis and Georgetown by the hoards, then dude... I. AM. OUT.  I will admit... designers like Vineyard Vines and Lilly Pulitzer can come out with a cute item once in awhile, but I do not want to be associated with that style of preppy.  Why?  If you see below, THAT is why. 

Sooooo~ yeeeeeeeah.  Good.  GOD.  I was innocently browsing Ruelala's Afternoon Fix Sale (okay--maybe not so innocently, because I MAY have come away with a cute LBD--but that's besides the point)... and I came across the Lilly P section.  The women's side was hardly as offensive, so I didn't bother with its own horrible images.  All I can think when I see all five of these clothing items staring back at me is... do people ever wear any of these things... TOGETHER??  I ask because that monstrosity of a tie was located next to the shirt on the site.  These "seafaring" fashion items seriously need to be thrown off a nearby cliff.  Ugh.  I can feel my corneas shriveling back into their sockets trying to hide.
**If you so desire, read about the origins of Vineyard Vines and Lilly Pulitzer on good ol' Wikipedia.